Strike....

Due to the WGA strike I am officially going off air in a show of solidarity. The WGA has also requested people to come together against Fremantle Media, who own The Price is Right, due to shoddy treatment of writers.

This is of course not official as I am not an official writer nor a guild member. But I understand their plight and hope the companies understand it soon.

Oh Snap! A New Post!

The PIR blog is listed as dead on other sites, and they pretty much are correct. But alas a new post.

First off, thanks for checking, I might do this again someday, then again I might not.

Second, read my other thing, a comic at westerncomic.stripgenerator.com . I've been working really hard on it and I hope you like it, for it too may be dead soon.

Third, please grant your support to Drew Carey. He's hosting the Price now, and starting monday it'll be shown. He likes it, gives props to Bob by urging people to spay and neuter, and he's silly. Or so they say.

So tune in and tune out. Its a big world out there, good thing we have television.

New Host Reactions.

So it's been a few hours and I think I'm ready to let my jealousy slide.

We here at the PIR blog have decided to back Drew Carey. He's already got the job so I don't know what good it will do. We've decided to give full support for Drew in his new endeavor.

Why you ask? Is he good enough? How did you reach this decision?

Well, I watched Letterman last night, just to see him announce it. But the interview didn't start off that way, instead Drew went on for a bit about his love of soccer. Point - Carey.

Secondly he went on to quip that he wont be watching any American football games if Vick is playing. Love of animals and publicly stating such earns Carey point two.

Are there better candidates? No, not that I can think of anyway.

Let me know if you think differently and I'll make sure your opinion counts.

Carson out.

Inside sources...

You heard it here first.

Drew Carey, you know lovable fat guy with glasses, looked surprising like his rival on "the drew carey show" , you know that clown girl who wouldn't fit in a big rig.

Anyway, I'm super-duperly thrilled for Drew. At least McDonald's wont go out of business.


Sorry to rant, just making sure that if Drew wanted to see what press this got, he would be a bit dismayed, maybe enough to drop out of the race. But alas, my kindness wont allow this kind of treatment.

He's not that fat, and I shouldn't target that anyway. He's made me laugh before, but Bob Barker is one not easy to replace. I could think of worse candidates, and better ones, but Drew's alright.

Will I continue, critique his preformance? No, I'm done, save for a good-bye post linking to a few of my favorite things.

In all I wish him well, he's got a hand in the cookie jar of American bliss, and hopefully he'll find that double chocolate chip I left him.

Bon Jour. Carson.

What next?

So, I'm pretty much done with all I can say about PIR. Sure I could probably write an entire encyclopedia on the subject, but sometimes life calls for change.

I'm calling on you all to help me decide what direction to go next. I'll throw out some choices or you can comment with your own.

For those who liked the comics, I may embark on an entire Blog of comics. That's choice 1, please text 'use 1' to 55535 and votes will be tabulated over the next week.*

Choice 2 is an ongoing repository for letters addressed to famous people or popular institutions.

Choice 3 is me taking over Perez Hilton's spot in the growing world of celebrity gossip.

You decide, or help me decide.

Your's Carson.

*please don't actually text, I just wanted to put that in there.

Rated G

So in addition to finding out how to post pictures, I've also found out how to get parental ratings to ensure my readers that this place is children friendly. It's bordering on PG because I used hell once, but hell what are you going to do.


If you'd like to check your blog it's http://mingle2.com/blog-rating.

TMZ got an R, so watch out kids and read this instead.

Unfortunately I'll be done soon, but all the material so far is open to all ages. I even snuck a 'dickhole' in there.

Carson out.

Rehab

"They tried to make me go to rehab, I said no no no."*

But I'll lock myself away if Rosie gets The Price.
First, too much controversy, I think this would be a ratings killer. Look, I'm not trying to be disrespectful but like Chappelle said, she wears underwear "with a dickhole in it." That and old people don't have much respect for the 'new'. That's why so much money is spent on advertising home delivery supplements, most grannies won't even try to save themselves the trip.
Also she's a hater. I mean the Rosie vs. Trump thing had it's moments on TMZ, but it's just press. And if you have to insult someone to get press, well then, how are you going to handle The Price? We need prince or princess, someone to delight us with innocence and a certian nobility. Can you provide that Rosie? Yeah, I'm calling you out, comment, I triple dog dare you.

Listen for the trumpets sounding, we'll bring this down wall yet. If you hear Rosie singing, it's all over.
Yours and Yours and Yours, and Mine. Bye.

*Amy Winehouse. (Who incidently I would like a little more if she looked a bit more pleasant. EDIT, maybe I just need another beer?)

Overbid.

Sunday, long weekend. Bob's last show was Friday, being also the date of celebrating my birth. Thanks Bob, nice thought, I like the gift.

Numerous people fell, one on stage, one "coming on down". Excitement was high, even with five day waits outside in the midst of that wonderful L.A. air.

It proceeded like most. Nothing to spectacular. One person smuggled in confetti, the stage and audience were washed in it.

Prizes were given, smiles had, people almost wet themselves.

Then Bob said thanks, thanks for inviting him into your home.

What will happen to the PIR blog? Well, as Charlie said after Desmond's predictions, it'll die. Soon in fact, so don't hold onto much hope. The cycle of life. It has to happen. But I'll thank you toward the end.

Till that day.

By Popular Vote.

I 'heart' Bob t-shirts are becoming cliche in the final hours of The Price. Instead a new wave of Bob centric compliments are reigning contestants row. Today it was "Bob A Licious" and "Bob Barker; the sexiest man alive".

While Bob was flattered, and in no way did these shirts lend influence to contestant placement I'm sure, I'm left wondering who makes up these decisions. I only say this because George Clooney is reputably the "sexiest man alive" but I would really love to throw my hat in the ring.

Some Canadian brought Bob a watch today and bribed his was to contestant row, later getting into the games winning a piano. Should I send someone a watch or a pen set to get on this sexiest list?

I'm trying to be modest here, but again one of the things I love about The Price is the abundance of everyday Americans. Although I might not beat the average American in a fist fight, I like to think mirrors favor me more than most.

So George and Bob, it's on. I'll be up there soon and we can walk the streets getting the popular vote. George, no Armani, it might give you a slight advantage with the gold diggers, and Bob, no puppies, that's just not fair.

Clearance!

Today in the first five minutes of PIR prizes included a 2800.00 dollar pool table, then the chance to win three cars. A Chevy compact, a Jeep, and a convertible Mustang.

With only two shows left, that's right last show on friday, Bob and the staff at PIR seem to be clearing the studio for the next new daytime blockbuster. Perhaps they will replace PIR with a marionette style shopping spree gameshow, little do they know I've patented the idea.

I wonder if they will have an auction ala the police ads you see sometimes. I would only make the trip for a hovercraft. A hovercraft or some cheap supplements.

25 steps to 15,000.

Some woman just won a hovercraft on the Price. A personal hovercraft that holds four and from what I understand is worth over fifteen thousand. She was playing cliffhangers*, and landed on the last space available.

Imagine driving a personal hovercraft back from LA down the coast. I wonder if it has a CD player?



*
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cliff_Hangers

Rachel.

I am not alone. There are PIR fans that could trump me in trivia, pricing and a fist fight all at the same time, any day of the week, any hour of the day. I don't doubt it for one typing moment.

Now I'm not being modest. Today I would've won a catamaran, over three grand in cash, a chair, a power generator and more. All decisions that I made better than those on TV. I was better than all of those contestants and could've beat them in a fist fight too.

Then it's Plinko. A game that isn't playable from home, but yet still survives as a crowd favorite. It's mere mention will boost visitors here by at least five. And the guy playing it knows the game too. He's seen it before and acts astonishingly excited. I've seen it before too, not Plinko, the reaction. This man has yet to impress me, and now I'm sizing him up for that fateful day in the ring.

Then the south paw. He calls a Beauty by name. Even Bob himself is impressed and that's like telling Zeus you just made him a better mount. I'm stunned, thinking 'why don't I know these Beauties' names?' It would certainly come in handy, even at a cocktail party depending on what was on TV.

The man continues, following the standard Plinko probabilities formula to a T, landing all Plinko chips within three spaces from the big money, the ten grand space that you dream about while eating a bagel with coffee. *

But when it got to be his turn, he couldn't conquer the wheel, which leads me to believe he doesn't have a replica in his garage.**

Impressed as I am, I still could've beat him in a fist fight or at least a bocce tourney.

Till that day Ladies and Gents.


*see post re; Plinko strategy. will post link later.***
**see post re; garage wheel. will post link later.***

***EDIT***I don't think the probability one is here, I'll have to repost and the garage wheel has eluded me so far, stay patient.

***EDIT*** Plinko strategy not found. Reposting.

The Price is Right 7/6/06
Current mood: Enlightened

Today on The Price is Right... PLINKO!!!

It's been awhile since I've seen this game, but it is one of my favorites. Probably due to the simplicity, not unlike my addiction to roulette while in Vegas. All you have to do is drop your Plinko chip into the board, consisting of pegs and Plexiglas, and wait. It ends when your chip hits the bottom with prizes of zero dollars to ten large. Done perfectly you could walk fifty grand up. Bob explained this with much anticipation, all the while knowing in his heart no one has ever done this in the history of The Price is Right.

This morning was far from perfect, a fraction of the fifty grand and not even a sliver of excitement for the crowd.

The contestant did well winning his 4 extra Plinko chips by guessing the prices of a compact washer, a set of binoculars and two other prizes that have escaped me. However his luck ended there. He stood five Plinko chips up and a chance at Fifty grand. He walked after hitting four zero's and a five hundred dollar mark. Ten percent of where he could have been.

As a new part of my Price is Right updates, I've decided to concentrate on a more enlightening aspect of this rambling. Far better than entertainment, I'm going to teach you the best way to win at Plinko. Apparently the best strategy is to drop the Plinko chip between the fourth and fifth pegs to the left of the plink board. This will optimize your chances of winning the impossible five grand.

Although you may not win it all, you'll look a lot better than the sap this morning. Good luck and good night.

(resource- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plinko)

***

Montreal

So I'm curious how many times a one dollar bet pays off. It seems often, but also means that the other three players have to hurdle the price and that you have to be in a good position. Any card players read this? It's like limping in on a big blind or having a position right of the dealer and a lot of people folding. You might not have anything, not a pair of twos or any frame of reference for the price of a toaster/egg boiler / radio combo, but it doesn't matter. You could've played it blind, not known about the twos or the toaster /egg boiler / radio combo, all you needed to know is that the three suckers next to you have already taken themselves out of the game.

Someone just said 'hi' to a Carson, but it was his son and I don't think it was my dad. Unless he was trying to win me a PIR car for my birthday. If it was him, he screwed up on the wheel and my chances are through. Good effort Pops.

Montreal? Who wants a trip to Montreal?

Putter.

Someone stole Bob's putter and then returned it out of shame. And then Bob made the very first inspiration put after getting it back.

You're still going to hell buddy, you stole Bob's putter. And besides, The Creator is a PIR fan. I bet he's money on the showcase showdowns.

PLINKO!!!!!

So I don't think they've played this today, but they had a dog up for adoption in LA county named Plinko. A cute little black lab pup. So, all you LA readers, go to your local shelter and pick up Plinko, or another friendly companion of the like.

Also someone just won ten dollars on PIR. That's got to be a record.

Getting on to the Million Dollar Special, I don't think the producers wanted to toss a million dollars to the public without some return and with Bob Barker no longer presiding I'm sure they were trying to pinch pennies. That or people just suck at PIR.

It's really the wheel, but someone somewhere has to have that wheel down. I'm sure a full scale model exists in some pole barn in Montana and Jeb's morning routine is at least a hundred spins with coffee. Just enough to keep up the skills while waiting to win on scratch off's so he can afford the plane ticket.

Maybe.

Anyway, if you didn't catch last night, you didn't miss much. A lot of cars and crazy prices, but I wish they had a parade or something.

Also, tonight is a tribute to Bob Barker, just in case you were wondering, till that day.

Million Dollar Showcase!!!

Except the channel is on set to America's Next Top Model... O.K. we're fine.

Back to a showcase devoted to Bob's past, mentioning a town my car broke down in on the way to Cali.

Dude is bidding way low.

Gal, you're up...

She basically did the one dollar over move, we'll see how it holds up.

And he's over, meaning I shouldn't play this game seriously, or stake my life on it.

More updates soon.

Don't call it a comeback...

... We've been here for years.

Two winners, a car a piece.

A now some woman has a "will neuter for plinko chips" shirt.

What will the showcases hold? I bet the moon alice, the moon.

Half Million Losers, a 1/2 time update

Million dollar special minute twenty-six.

And not one winner. A Dodge Viper, a Lincoln, a million dollars, and no winners.

Sure some girl got a motorcycle, a gemstone, but as for a last million dollar special...

well we're only halfway through.

Actual Retail Price is...

Bob just got kissed by a man. I've fallen victim of inattentiveness. And the actual retail price is....

First off, this guy on stage as I type is wearing a "bob I need a job" shirt and I'm wishing I'd thought of it first. He blew his chances when he kissed Bob I reckon. Bob, from all my sources*, likes the ladies. At this point I think he'd be happy being a CBS janitor, or as some refer; a workman.

Also, as some of you may have noticed, my blog is ripe with errors, grammitical and informational. I apologize, I'm not as s.m.r.t. as I would have lead you all to believe. Please let me know if I need to clarify anything. I could make excuses, but I've got a beer to finish.

And the actual retail price is.... a Million Dollars. That's a lot of McDonald's dollar snack parfaits. A lot. Like over a thousand. And that's what one lucky soul could possibly win on Bob's last primetime spectacular.

Last? That's like saying Leonard Skynard will have a final concert. We all know that Leonard Skynard will be doing the state fair circut well into the year of our (or my) lord 2172. Bob's last? or is it?

You decide at www.voteforbobbarkersretirementprimetimelastshowpurplewednesday.com

Have fun peeps, I'll see you all soon.


* www.tmz.com

A million dollars.

This wednesday a million dollars Price is Right spectacular! That's tomorrow folks [edit; this is 5/16/07 and thurday 5 /17/07, unemployment has my days a bit off] sorry for the late post, but I thought you would want to know. You will also note that this may coincide with LOST, which would be a non-point. I like The Show (I may actually start calling The Price The Show, as if no other exists) but a Dharma background is too tempting. I hope your on before ten Bob.

On Thursday however there is a 50 year Bob Barker tribute. Surely St. Peter is going to hear about this.

Today on The Show, regretfully, I noticed it's slipping.

Hey, wait a minute.... cut it out. ( Someone is throwing stones at the studio, hold on I have to call security.)

..

..

..

Now, please, if I didn't bring you the truth I'd be a sniveling booster. Nothing more than a CBS run newpaper acting more like a brochure. So I must with any integrity toward broadcast or blogcast standards tell you the downs as well as the ups, it's a roller coaster baby hang on.

So first the big wheel wasn't making it's regular clicking noise and I guess this isn't an apocalyptic failure, no one is getting fired. But if you wake up listing for that sound like a melodic morning parakeet or a lover's gentle kiss, you tend to miss it. (I'm not saying this is me, I'm just saying there's probably at least one person out there right, it's a big world.)

Second Bob didn't fully explain a game today, it was a simple error and he corrected himself. The crowd was shouting and a nervous contestant could've missed it. I believe it to be the cause of loss. But he was on screen with Bob and Bob was maybe just nervous because of the future.

We'll forgive you, but if this is how they're going to run it when your gone, I might have to find another 'The Show.'

I don't know what though. Someone just won both showcases, thirty-one dollars off. Round of applause, I'll talk to you all soon.